Well, Alabama made it a two-fer this week. First, it voted to uphold segregated schools and rejected free public education; now, another of its legislative dim bulbs, afraid that young Alabamans would decide that if anal sex was good enough for Plato, it was good enough for them, has proposed banning all books from libraries in which homosexuality is shown in a positive light.
Allen said that if his bill passes, novels with gay protagonists and college textbooks that suggest homosexuality is natural would have to be removed from library shelves and destroyed.
"I guess we dig a big hole and dump them in and bury them," he said.
Hehhehheh. Hey Beavis, he said "big hole."
The legislator, who appeared on the courthouse steps in jack boots and a trench coat, reported that the trauma caused by his erections in public libraries, as he read Evelyn Waugh novels and The Phaedo, was something he wanted to spare other young men. "I mean, my wife caught me beating off to a picture of Tennessee Williams and she's made me sleep on the couch ever since," he offered. "I'm doing this as a public service. No one should ever have to go through the trauma of getting turned on by reading about boys kissing each other. I thought that maybe I was a fag, until my pastor convinced me that it was the book's fault. Books are evil."